Words to Live By.

words to live by

Beautiful & Truthful

beautiful and truthful

14 Things Successful People Do On Weekends.

It’s Friday, and you know what that means right? It’s the weekeeeeend!! Unfortunately, many of us use our weekends to either play catch up or veg out. Instead of taking a mental vacation, why not try these simple steps to reenergize your body, mind, and spirit? Here’s to a fantastic weekend that’ll rev you up for Monday!

©2015 Susie Lee

weekends

10 Tips for a Happy Relationship

Here are 10 simple tips that can transform any relationship, not just marriages. If you’re happy at home, chances are you’ll be happier in life and more successful at work. But unfortunately, the pressures, demands, and expectations of everyday can rob you of the joy, love, and peace that you desire in your relationship. So continue to do the little things as they’ll make a big difference down the road, make a conscious choice each day to love them despite your lack of feelings, and never grow tired of showing them how much you care. May these tips bring you closer and stronger together for a brighter and happier future.

©2015 Susie Lee

Might not be today but you’ll be ok.

2015/01/img_1736-0.jpg There will be days when you’re not feeling your best, when you’d rather stay in bed than face the day. Some days living your best just might mean trying to make it through the day. And that’s ok. Be gentle and kind to yourself during these times for it’s the loving thing you can do. I know you may not believe it today but brighter days are just ahead.

©2015 Susie Lee

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You’re beautiful at every angle.

I hope you have someone in your life that tells you how beautiful you are – to articulate the beauty they see in you, the flickers of greatness they feel from you, and the light that illuminates within you. You’re a unique fingerprint that can’t be replicated in another. Your beauty, your talents, your voice, your personality, your quirks, your memories, and experiences – this is what makes you, you. Maybe if you could see yourself from every angle, you’d realize just how beautiful you are.

©2014 Susie Lee

Know that you are beautiful

Most Valuable Lesson We Can Learn In Life

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One of the most valuable lessons we can learn in life is how to love other people unconditionally. This doesn’t mean we condone a destructive behaviour but it does mean loving them with no strings attached – it means seeing them beyond their actions. So instead of being frustrated by their behaviour, or hurt by their actions, or offended by how they are, we’d save ourselves a lot of heartache by learning to love them where they’re at – happy, sad, upset, and even angry. Being hurt or offended by how they are will only cause more pain, misery, misunderstanding, and create distance.

We’re all a work in progress and are in desperate need of a daily transformation – to grow and live beyond our mistakes, hangups, and pain. We need each other to reach our full potential, see beyond the present, and discover how to love one another. When we feel genuine acceptance and compassion, true transformation begins to take work within us, and so with them. We need to envelop ourselves with love and then extend that grace to others, especially to those who are hurting, frustrated, angry, and lonely.

©2014 Susie Lee

This summer, make memories that are just yours.

i can't take your callEvery once in a while, I like to leave my phone at home or take a day off from it. Being disconnected from my gadget helps me to be in the moment and be present to those around me. It’s easier to be fully present as I’m not distracted to check my phone or be interrupted by a beep of a text or the ring of an incoming call.

This summer, I challenge you to put your phone away for a few days and to make memories that no one else knows about – memories you don’t have to capture, tag, or post… memories that are just yours. Experience things for what they are rather than losing the moment by trying to take the perfect picture. If you must take a picture, then take it with the lens of your eye rather than with the lens of your camera. Embrace and enjoy the moment.

I leave you with this challenging and creative video by Gary Turk: LOOK UP

Have a great summer!

©2014 Susie Lee

Heartwarming Stories: Small Acts of Kindness.

Today, I want to share with you a few of my favourite heartwarming stories. Often, giving of ourselves (and of our time) is worth more than giving of things. May we recognize opportunities to show kindness and to never underestimate the impact our small gestures can make in someone’s life – it can even be life changing.

©2014 Susie Lee

A NYC Taxi driver wrote…

ladyI arrived at the address and honked the horn. After waiting a few minutes I honked again. Since this was going to be my last ride of my shift I thought about just driving away, but instead I put the car in park and walked up to the door and knocked. ‘Just a minute’, answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor.

After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 90’s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940’s movie.

By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets.

There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.

‘Would you carry my bag out to the car?’ she said. I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman.

She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb.

She kept thanking me for my kindness. ‘It’s nothing’, I told her. ‘I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother to be treated.’

‘Oh, you’re such a good boy, she said. When we got in the cab, she gave me an address and then asked, ‘Could you drive through downtown?’

‘It’s not the shortest way,’ I answered quickly.

‘Oh, I don’t mind’, she said. ‘I’m in no hurry. I’m on my way to a hospice.’

I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. ‘I don’t have any family left’, she continued in a soft voice.’The doctor says I don’t have very long.’ I quietly reached over and shut off the meter.

‘What route would you like me to take?’ I asked.

For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator.

We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl.

Sometimes she’d ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.

As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, ‘I’m tired. Let’s go now’. We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico.

Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move. They must have been expecting her.

I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.

‘How much do I owe you?’ She asked, reaching into her purse.

‘Nothing,’ I said.

‘You have to make a living,’ she answered.

‘There are other passengers,’ I responded.

Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly.

‘You gave an old woman a little moment of joy’, she said. ‘Thank you.’

I squeezed her hand, and then walked into the dim morning light. Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life.

I didn’t pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run or had honked once, then driven away?

On a quick review, I don’t think that I have done anything more important in my life.

We’re conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments.

But great moments often catch us unaware-beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.

The Story of Kyle

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One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class walking home from school. His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, “Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.”

I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up, and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes.

My heart went out to him. So I jogged over to him, and as he crawled around looking for his glasses, I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, “Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.” He looked at me and said, “Hey thanks!” There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.

I helped him pick up his books and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before, but we talked all the way home, and I carried his books.

He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play football on Saturday with me and my friends. He said yes.

We hung out all weekend, and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him. And my friends thought the same of him. Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said, “Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!” He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends. When we were seniors, we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown, and I was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for business on a football scholarship.

Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation. I was so glad it wasn’t me having to get up there and speak.

On graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great. He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than me and all the girls loved him! Boy, sometimes I was jealous. Today was one of those days. I could see that he was nervous about his speech, so I smacked him on the back and said, “Hey, big guy, you’ll be great!” He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. “Thanks,” he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began. “Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach — but mostly your friends. I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story.” I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his mom wouldn’t have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. “Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.”

I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment. I saw his mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize its depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture, you can change a person’s life.

Ugly the Cat

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Everyone in the apartment complex where I lived knew who Ugly was. Ugly was the resident tomcat. Ugly loved three things in this world: fighting, eating garbage, and shall we say, love.

The combination of these things combined with a life spent outside had their effect on Ugly. To start with, he had only one eye and where the other should have been was a hole. He was also missing his ear on the same side, his left foot appeared to have been badly broken at one time, and had healed at an unnatural angle, making him look like he was always turning the corner.

Ugly would have been a dark gray tabby, striped type, except for the sores covering his head, neck and even his shoulders. Every time someone saw Ugly there was the same reaction. “That’s one UGLY cat!!!”

All the children were warned not to touch him, the adults threw rocks at him, hosed him down, squirted him when he tried to come in their homes, or shut his paws in the door when he would not leave.

Ugly always had the same reaction. If you turned the hose on him, he would stand there, getting soaked until you gave up and quit. If you threw things at him, he would curl his lanky body around your feet in forgiveness. Whenever he spied children, he would come running, meowing frantically and bump his head against their hands, begging for their love. If you picked him up he would immediately begin suckling on your shirt, earrings, whatever he could find.

One day Ugly shared his love with the neighbor’s huskies. They did not respond kindly, and Ugly was badly mauled. From my apartment I could hear his screams, and I tried to rush to his aid. By the time I got to where he was laying, it was apparent Ugly’s sad life was almost at an end.

Ugly lay in a wet circle, his back legs and lower back twisted grossly out of shape, a gaping tear in the white strip of fur that ran down his front. As I picked him up and tried to carry him home, I could hear him wheezing and gasping, and could feel him struggling. I must be hurting him terribly, I thought.

Then I felt a familiar tugging, sucking sensation on my ear – Ugly, in so much pain, suffering and obviously dying, was trying to suckle my ear. I pulled him closer to me, and he bumped the palm of my hand with his head, then he turned one golden eye towards me, and I could hear the distinct sound of purring. Even in the greatest pain, that ugly battled scarred cat was asking only for a little affection, perhaps some compassion.

At that moment I thought Ugly was the most beautiful, loving creature I had ever seen. Never once did he try to bite or scratch me, try to get away from me, or struggle in any way. Ugly just looked up at me completely trusting in me to relieve his pain.

Ugly died in my arms before I could get inside, but I sat and held him for a long time afterwards, thinking about how one scarred, deformed little stray could so alter my opinion about what it means to have true pureness of spirit, to love so totally and truly. Ugly taught me more about giving and compassion than a thousand books, lectures, or talk show specials ever could, and for that I will always be thankful .

He had been scarred on the outside, but I was scarred on the inside, and it was time for me to move on and learn to love truly and deeply. To give my total to those I cared for.

Many people want to be richer, more successful, well liked, beautiful, but for me, I will always try to be Ugly.

Self Care in Crisis Mode

Self careLife can be challenging with deadlines, needs, and our own expectations. It can be unpredictable with what it throws our way, what our days look like, or how the people in our lives behave. But when we neglect to take care of ourselves, especially in the midst of crisis, we’ll eventually wear ourselves out to the point that even the simplest task can look monumentally impossible. We may even experience a nervous breakdown where we cry and scream in anger, and it’s ok if that happens. It doesn’t mean we’re weak, broken, or worthless – it’s just our body’s way of releasing the accumulated stress in our bodies like a pressure cooker releasing its steam. But once we release our angst and anxiety, it’s important not to stay in that place for too long – we’re just meant to be visitors passing through, not be permanent residents. Here are 5 simple ways we can take care of ourselves before, during, or after a breakdown:

  1. SLEEP: This alone will do wonders for our mental, physical, and emotional well-being. It’s perhaps the only time where we consciously and subconsciously let go. We’ll usually function and cope better after a deep uninterrupted sleep.
  1. EAT: Our body needs nutrients to keep the immune system strong, ward off sickness, and keep our mind alert in making better choices. Especially during crisis mode, it’ll help to stabilize our emotions and balance our hormones. Replenish the body with healthy food choices and drink lots of water to remove any toxins.
  1. SUPPORT: No man is an island, have a few key people to lean on during this time – either talk it out, take a break from worries to have fun, or be in the quiet company of them.
  1. REST: Throughout the day either take a nap or a *tea break. Close your eyes, be still, and listen to your breathing. *I suggest staying away from caffeinated beverages as it may rattle your nerves.
  1. LET GO: Most times, our stress and internal turmoil are self-induced. Learn to recognize and let go of misplaced responsibilities, self-imposed expectations, letting others down, or what you think others want you to be. Learn to say ‘no’ to people’s request and also, to yourself – you don’t have to get anything done, it can wait.

May we find simplicity, perspective, and peace in our journey.

©2014 Susie Lee